Marriages are special. A promise to be together for a lifetime. But when they are inter-faith, in an Asian sub-context, they are even more special. Special because they are almost impossible. Fighting against all odds: the nature, the people, the family & often the very judgmental society at large, it is a difficult choice in action. And when they finally get married, they like to believe that the troubles have come to an end. Whereas the problems, might have perhaps begun. Everything from conversion of the unfortunate love struck lady to the children’s religion to management of assets is a difficult question. Grappled with personal difficulties, begins the intervention of the prophetic extended family and in-laws, who like to believe that their religion is the best.
So when two love-lorn, attractive young lovers Payal & Omar decided to marry in 1994, little did they imagine that one day this beautiful relationship that defied against all odds of religion & culture, will eventually end in an ugly divorce.
Whether two people decide to remain married or fall apart, is definitely a private question, not to be governed by the media or public at large. But, alas, not so in the case of an Inter-Faith marriage! And that too of one of the most high-profile family ruling the ethnically cleansed Muslim majority state Kashmir in India. A conservative Muslim majority state ruled by a Muslim leader born of mixed parents(Omar’s mother is a British Christian), Omar’s decision to marry a Hindu girl was never well taken by the conservatives. And when Payal refused to convert, she lost all possible opportunities of any favourable public opinion.
17 years and two sons later, the cracks in the marriage started to surface. Apparently not because of societal pressure, but because of some internal conflicts. Or perhaps an Outsider, an extra-marital. Those unhappy with Payal-Omar alliance, rejoiced on the prospects of Omar’s another marriage to their liking. Those unhappy with Payal’s decision to not to convert, felt it getting even with her.
If it were a normal divorce between two same faith couples, it could have perhaps been like any other divorce. But not so when it is a question of faith. Different faiths when they get together create controversies. But when they fall apart, they create masala for media, gossip for the town and a trailing track of tragedy for the lonely spouse cheated by the world and embittered by the one she loved more then her own self.
Questions of Right to Privacy & Freedom of Life in this charged up atmosphere are wishful thinking at best. A tragedy for the system as a whole.
Inter-Faith marriages that are Divine’s way to bridge the divide between two faiths ends up creating further divides. It is beautiful how people from different religions come together and fall in love. They defy all the existing norms of the society to create a new world order. It is God’s way of showing a way beyond the existing system, closeted people. But when such beautiful dreams fall apart(for whatever reason), it is more then just a divorce. Perhaps that’s why it occupies so much media space, TRP ratings and irresponsible statements.
Time to introspect, when responsibilities on the shoulders of Inter-Faith couple is so high, should they not re-define their relationship and responsibilities? And perhaps also think a little beyond themselves: of the society at large. And the children they make in the process… symbolic of their love.. do they deserve to be poisoned by their spitefulness of separation??.....
No comments:
Post a Comment